Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Thus sprach Althea

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 by Dawn B
"Boo!"
Scared you, didn't I? Ha, ha, ha!
Don't worry, it's just me, Althea.
You're probably wondering how my parents' little "speech project" is going. Well, I'm picking up new words every day now, but of course, I say them when I want to, thank you very much. I am not a trained puppy.
More importantly, my parents are finally catching on to some of the improvements I have made to the English language. For example, it is silly to have two words: "hot" and "cold." I use "hot" to indicate an unexpected temperature and then let the context explain the meaning. It's so much simpler.
For those of you without the benefit of my personal training, here's a primer of some of my favorite words. I started you off with "boo!" Always a crowd pleaser. Adults are so silly. I hide my face behind my hands and they suddenly can't find me! Boo indeed, you goofy people.

"Eyes!"
This is my improvement on the strange words "glasses" and "sunglasses." Again, context provides all the meaning you need. It's so much simpler to call the thing you put over your eyes by the same name. Recently, mommy managed to find a pair of eyes for me in a pink pirate motif. There's hope for her fashion sense yet.
On the same principle, the soft white papery things I love so much are called "nose." This is far better since the adults can't decide if they are called "tissues" or "Kleenex."

"Nack!"
O.K. now, this one is important. If I ask you for a "nack," it's time for some serious noshing. I like fruit nacks or little cracker nacks, but I'm not averse to more substantial pizza nacks. But none of this "sharing" a piece, mommy. Go get your own!
Here I am with mommy at the church trip out to the local water park. "Wa-ter" is definitely one of my all time favorite words. It's refreshing to drink and it's so much fun for splashing, pouring, dropping, controlling, and not controlling. It makes fun color changes on just about everything it touches, yet mommy doesn't seem to mind nearly so much as when I use ketchup. Ummm . . . ketchup.

"Run!"
Love the word, LOVE the action! I especially love playing the "chase me" game when we're out in a big crowded place, like an airport. My folks are not always so keen on it though, as on the day of this picture, when I guess we were supposed to march in the parade for the Festival of Cultures. The dragon was distracting people from seeing me though, and I didn't want them to miss out.

"Airplane!"
I usually say this in a deep, dramatic voice, because airplanes are so great! I don't know how they get so little up in the sky, then so big on the ground. I also don't understand how their sound doesn't match where they are in the sky overhead. Very cool though.
After a long dry spell of not flying, I have finally gotten back into the air. Here I am demonstrating some of the safety features of this Canadair Regional Jet. We are on our way to the Covenant Annual Meeting in Portland, OR. I cheered up many people by roaming the aisles and thoughtfully told my mommy whenever I found someone going "ni-ni." (She can be kind of loud sometimes, and I didn't want her to wake them up.)

"Nake!"
Girls just love nakes! Mommy seems to think it's funny to have me tell her what a nake says: "sssssssssssssss." (As if I couldn't say "snake" whenever I wanted to.)
At the meeting, I got to meet a lot of nice people. We met some especially nice people when I happened to throw up in the hotel lobby. Mommy caught it with both hands. (Way to go, mom!) I thought it was very sporting of me not to play "catch me" until after someone brought her a big pile of napkins from the nearby restaurant.
We also met some very nice people at the nearby clinic when I developed spots all over my body. I preferred the term "pots." Seems I'm allergic to something in Portland. Just as long as it's not the snakes.

"My!" and "Mine!"
Words dear to the mouth of any toddler, I like to use them to claim people as well. Pictured at right is "my Mark." He lives at the church in a little room near mommy and daddy's offices ("church!" is also fun to say, isn't it?) . Apparently he got ordained at the meeting. I don't really know what that means, but it involved a LOT of other people dressing up in the same black robe and stole. For someone my size, this meant that everyone seemed like they were "my Mark," yet when I pulled on their robes, a different face would appear. Downright surreal.

"No!" This word is mission critical. You've just got to set limits with parents sometimes. It's for their own good.

"Happy!"
I like this word 'cause it's so versatile. You can use it for birthdays, anniversaries, or just to make people smile. Here we are using the word on Adoption Day--celebrating the one year anniversary of our family. Can you believe it's been a year? Seems like almost my whole life.
We went out to our park to see a kids' show and spent the whole day together. That reminds me of another great phrase :"Gotch-you!" We love saying that to each other, 'cause we really like that we've got each other. Happy indeed.
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